Remembering

Sunday was my birthday and I celebrated by taking a nice, long nap.  Before I laid down Layne asked me what my tolerance level for surprises was. (It's usually very low.) I told him that as long as it didn't interfere with my nap I was okay with anything.  Well, I woke up to find the living room rearranged and the Christmas tree up!  Normally I am adamant about waiting until December to do anything remotely Christmassy but for some reason this year I started singing Christmas songs weeks ago!  I am really excited about Christmas this year.  On Sunday we didn't decorate the tree, we just enjoyed it with it's lights on.  (Oh the wonder of a pre-lit tree!!!  Thank you after-Christmas clearance two years ago!!!)   It was a wonderful birthday treat.  I loved watching the gleam in the kids eyes as they stared at the tree.

Monday night we decorated the tree for Family Night and got a few other things out as well.  As I dug into my obsessively organized bins I realized something was terribly wrong!  Everything was all mixed up!  It took me a minute and then I remembered.  I remembered that last December I was pregnant with Ada.  I was miserable and uncomfortable.  Two days before Christmas I spent the night in the hospital getting contractions under control.  Then we had Christmas and...Layne left for Afghanistan.  I was alone, and uncomfortable and worried about my husband.  And then I got sick.  And the kids got sick.  And my mom came to the rescue.  When we got home from the airport James pointed at the filthy floor and said "Grammie, you help clean up?"  And she did.  She cleaned and cooked and stocked my freezer.  She let me rest and kept me company.  And even though I had insisted I would eventually get around to it she took put away our Christmas things while I was sleeping one day.  I was so very grateful then and as I looked through the bins yesterday trying to find the things the kids were looking for I felt so tremendously grateful yet again.  Grateful for a mom who came to a rescue and a mother-in-law who later came to take over.  Grateful for friends who helped me through that time.  Grateful that Ada decided to hang tight until Layne got home, even if she only gave him a couple of hours to relax before making her appearance.  Grateful that she was healthy and still is.  I remember being so scared to give birth in the winter.  I was terrified of the illnesses she might encounter in her first few months - especially after she spent her first 24 hours in the NICU.  I am grateful that we sailed through those months.  I'm grateful for what she has added to our family and that we are all healthy and happy as we look forward to Christmas this year.  Yes, I have plenty of reasons to sing - and I can't wait for Christmas!